A Mother From Pennsylvania

A mother with other LGBTQ family members tells of her gay son.

• Briefly describe how your child first came out to you and your first reactions.

• We were driving Nathan to his first year in college. About two hours from home he announced to his father and me that he was gay. I said, “I love you. Please jsut don’t let anyone tell you if you just loved Jesus more, it would go away!” I just wanted him to know I loved him…just the way he is!

• What concerns did you experience over the first weeks or months? How did you deal with them?

• Worried about his room mate at college. He assured me it was OK. Also worried about getting sick from AIDS; he assured me he takes his medicine.

• Has your child come out to other family members over time? If yes, what was their reaction?

• We have other queer folk in our family so it really wasn’t a surprise. Everyone accepts my son.

• What is the hardest thing about knowing their LGBTQ identity?

• That some people will assume he is bad that they will miss the opportunity to know a really wonderful person.

• Knowing what you know today, would you want your child to “stay in the closet”? Why?

• No, I wish he would have told me sooner.

• What would you say to youth coming out to their families?

• Be brave and proud. You were born this way and God loves you just the way you are. Know that your parents have a plans for you. Your sexual identity may change some of those ideas…but it will be OK; change is hard to accept; it takes time. The bottom line is they love you.

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