It’s not uncommon for email or texts to be the first communication, and it can be a shock. To some extent parents have to wait for the child to be ready to talk, but in the meantime there is a lot you can do yourself. One of the stumbling blocks parents face are the many questions they have, but it’s important to educate yourself and not rely on your child to answer everything. Often they are still working things out themselves, or they may feel “under the microscope” with too many questions.
Instead, use the Parent Guides section on this website as a starting point. You can read the Transgender Parent Guide online, have it emailed to you in 5 chapters, or buy our book (Parenting Transgender Children: a Guide for Keeping Your Family Strong) on Amazon. Each of these provides information about your child’s journey, understanding what transgender means and the many ways it can be expressed, how to deal with your own worry and fear, how to help, what to avoid, and so much more. We help you get started and point you to many books, resources, and organizations that can support you as well. For stories from other parents of transgender children, check out the Hopeful Voices/Family Stories section.
This can be a time of enormous risk for your trans child. Family support and connection are their lifeline and safety net. Your love, encouragement, and belief in them as a good person is a foundation to help them believe in themselves.
Thousands of families have experienced this enormous change in their family and stayed strong and connected. We hope that will be true for your family as well.